Pedro Silva Part 2
===
Track 1: [00:00:00] Welcome to Compassionate Las Vegas, the podcast. I'm Will Rucker and thank you for joining us for this program. It has been such an incredible season and our guests have been just so inspiring, so insightful. And so we've had to bring a couple of them back a couple of times because the timing just did not allow us To plumb the depths of their wisdom.
And today's guest is coming back for round two, , because we just had more to talk about. So Pedro, welcome back to compassionate Las Vegas.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Thanks. Having me.
Track 1: I'm absolutely thrilled. It's our honor, for sure. So, when we were speaking before, we talked a lot about belonging and DEI and, , just really big love, , and that's how you chose to define compassion. And so, [00:01:00] I, I know that we've spent many times talking about someone that's an inspirational figure. For so many, they actually made a Netflix movie about him because of how impactful his life was.
And this individual spent his life really bridging cultures. And I think that in our conversation, that's what we've discovered you do is bridge cultures. And the individual I'm talking about is none other than the great Bishop Carlton Pearson, uh, who many may know from his book on the gospel of inclusion or his work with Azusa, which was one of the largest, uh, Christian conferences ever.
And it brought people like TD Jakes and the Clark sisters. And I mean, anyone who's anyone in the Christian arena came through Azusa. So I wanted to talk because he was a personal friend of yours. And I wanted to see what's the, biggest lesson you learned [00:02:00] from him.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: It probably would go back to that compassion, that die, that big love because out of all the people that I've known in my life, I'm not exaggerating when I say that Carlton Pearson was the most innocent human I've ever met. Um, and to unpack that when he went through all the things that he went through when he, he was touched by big love, you know, and instead of, um, saying, oh shoot, this big love, uh, can't my ministry can't contain this big love.
He allowed himself to to fall into the depths of big love. And then when he brought that out. And people had a reaction to it. And I remember asking him, I met him after this happened, by the way, but I remember asking him, didn't you know that you were going to get this kind of backlash and he innocently [00:03:00] did not think he was, he was, um, I mean, he sometimes would say, well, maybe he was arrogant about thinking that people would just listen to him because he had been listened to by so many thousands and thousands of people.
But really he just was so thrilled with the idea that God's love was bigger than he could have ever imagined that. And he was humble enough truthfully. He was humble enough to say, man, I've been preaching this. This thing for a lot of years, I've been going down this road for a long time, genuinely and authentically.
And it brought me to a place that I didn't expect. And now that it brought me to this place, um, I have to be humble enough. To share what I've observed. And he paid the consequences of that, but he didn't wanna hold it against the people who turned on him. And a lot of the people who did turn on him, he still, when, if they ever [00:04:00] had problems, he was the first one, uh, to have their back.
And I think that says a lot, uh, is as I reflect on his life and his death. I personally feel that he died from a broken heart, and I think that his heart was broken because he had poured so much of his life into authentically loving, wanting to, uh, be an imitator of Christ and everything he did, he did it out of sincerity, right?
Or whether it manifested as acceptable or unacceptable, he always did it out of a place of big love. And whatever came out of that, even when he got the backlash, he didn't even resist the backlash because he knew that he had taught things in the past that [00:05:00] unconsciously he harmed people. He wasn't trying to, he thought he was saving people.
He thought he was helping people. And in the course of trying to sincerely help them, he harmed them. So then when the backlash came on him from his own side, he basically was like, well, I guess this is what I get, you know, it's coming back on me from my side. The things that I unconsciously did to harm other people.
And so he, he could also look back and go, well, I see why they're turning on me because I was one of them. And he, instead of me. Trying to, um, for the most part, I should say, and try instead of trying to turn it back on them, he's absorbed it. And then I think that that diminishes his health.
Track 1: Let's talk about some of that for a bit. The, I also agree. I think it was the brokenheartedness. That finally took over his physical body. And I do [00:06:00] believe people die from broken hearts. I think
that, , we've so disconnected mental health from physical health, , in the way we address life that we just, we miss it.
But one thing you said in that I, I heard misunderstood and people are often misunderstood. They have intentions that are pure, that are out of big love. And. They still cause harm. So how do you navigate the space of being misunderstood, of misunderstanding others, of wanting to do something that's beneficial, that then creates unintended consequences or harm and keep going with that.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Um, when I was younger, out of my sincerity, I used to hand out tracts to people and say, Hey, uh, God loves you and you're going to burn an eternal torture and a torment for not accepting this love, you know? So, and I did [00:07:00] that. You know, thinking I was doing good. I used to pray for people that weren't Christian and be like, Oh God, please just do this.
You know, I would like, try to figure out ways to like, pray a prayer that would have got infiltrate this person's free will and make them, uh, serve God in the way that I thought would. They should serve God because I sincerely loved people. Um, that was a part of my journey, but then I had a Muslim cousin who called me out on it.
And, uh, he said to me one time, I said, well, he said, man, why y'all was trying to convert me, man. And then he was like, I said, well, I want to be with you in heaven. And he was like, well, you ain't even with me on earth. You're like, like you're, you're, you take Time that we can be hanging out, trying to convince me to listen to your family, your parents and grandma.
Track 1: and,
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: And all I'm doing is listening to my parents. So it was like, why do you think following what your mom and grandma are telling you [00:08:00] should overrun or override what my mom and my dad are telling me?
Track 1: my mom telling
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: And then he's like, it's the same thing, except for I'm not trying to do that to you. And I was like, and I heard it.
So I was harming him, you know, but I didn't even realize I was harming him. Thinking I was loving him, then he corrected me and I heard it and then I stopped. And that's the, I think the challenge in this country, um, for a lot of people or across the globe is people are, don't want to be wrong. And without, Beaten this horse too much.
I do think that the fear of being wrong again ties to what I said in the last episode about our fundamental fear of death that we equate being wrong with a death sentence. And so we try to be right at all costs and we try to get the right answers at all costs, even in our educational system. We don't, we don't encourage people [00:09:00] on their learning journey.
We reward people for getting the right answers. And when we reward people for getting the quote unquote, right, right answers, people will then do things to justify getting the right answers. So if they say, well, the goal is to get an ACE so I can get that gold sticker. Well, I could study all the time or I could cheat
Track 1: can change it.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: and I'll still get the same grade and I'll still get the same gold star.
And the gold star is what it's about because that's what makes you value. That's what makes you belong. That's what makes you loved all these other things. And so we had that. Kind of like trained into us.
Right.
Track 1: that that's kind of driving modus for a lot of individuals. It's like the end goal is heaven. And even if you look at the Middle Eastern conflict that has been going on forever, it's still kind of wrapped in this idea that in the next life in the next world, we've got to get to the end goal [00:10:00] versus really living through that journey.
So I just, I just wanted to interject
that. Please continue.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Yeah. So what I was going to say about how we get educated into this mindset is I remember I took a quiz when I was in, I think it was like seventh grade and I got a 10 and my teacher was like, Pedro, You got a 10 on this quiz and she knew my mom and she said your family would be so embarrassed. Um, I can't believe you did this bad.
And I started laughing and she was like, it's not funny. And I said, well, I didn't know any of it before. So I'm 10 points up. And she was like, That's ridiculous. So then she, I did a retake. I got like a 40 or somewhere around there. And then she was like, Petro, she's like, are you even studying? I said, yeah, just not sticking.
You know, I'm studying. It was not sticking. And I was like, I said, but man, look, I just went from like a 10 to like a 40 and you're not going to give me like a high five or something that I'll clearly learn. And it's just taking me a [00:11:00] while. And she was just like, you should be ashamed of I don't even want to see your mom in church on Sunday because I know your mom's smart and you're making these low grades.
I can't even look at your mom's face. And, but to me, I was like, I didn't care what she thought. I was like, I'm learning lady. Like I might be not learning at your pace, but I went from zero to 10 to 40. And eventually I passed it about the fourth or fifth time. And I was like, yes, I did it. I passed it. And she was like, how are you celebrating?
But that's how we should be. Because we're all on a learning trajectory and some things come to us easier to some people, easier than other people on different issues. Don't we all have our own types of genius is not all the same genius and we're on this learning journey, this progressive learning journey, and we're just not taught that we're taught, like, you gotta get the gold star.
Or your belonging is threatened. Your love is threatened. Your life is threatened because they're [00:12:00] like, well, how are you going to make it in college? If you don't, if you can't do good. And then that's threatening your life, you know? So we're stuck in these paradigms and they get reinforced in the institutions and then the companies and all the things we're a part of.
And so I understand, like I, sometimes when I get frustrated, I used to get frustrated with people for getting caught up in this stuff. But now I just call them good students that they got taught that growing up and they believed it. They didn't know any different. They came here innocently and uh, and they got, they became good students.
And I think Carlton never said good students, but I think that that's what he understood was that people just were repeating what they were taught and that it wasn't personal. When they turned on him. And so he learned what he learned and he kept learning and he kept trying to teach, but he also understood that the people who were coming out against him were just being good students.
And I think that that's how we kind of keep moving forward. And, and we realized that sometimes [00:13:00] we were good students that harmed people because we learned from our environment and our system, that that was the way to respond to a situation. And then once we learn a better way, we just come back and we just teach.
Okay. You know, I think that that's probably how we do it.
Track 1: , by Maya Angelou that, and I'm probably gonna not get it exactly right, but, , the essence is when someone shows you who they are, believe them.
And I've also heard people add on believe them the first time.
And so, , just total transparency, never been a fan of that particular quote.
, but a lot of people really gravitate to it, and I think there is some truth in there. But the reason I bring that up is the idea of change. And in the instance of Bishop Carlton Pearson, he evolved, or changed. And people didn't love that. They were
like, even at his home going, , his funeral, , people were like, And that's the Carlton that we like.
And as he was transitioning, when he [00:14:00] was on his literal deathbed, people were like, and we're gonna call you back to this, this place in 1980.
When, you know, it's now 2024. , but we want you to be who you were. And so, I wonder your thoughts on Evolution on people growing and iteration and, and becoming new versions of themselves and how you, how you navigate, , maybe the person you fell in love with, or the , person you begin to idolize or study as they continue their life path and become something different and just kind of one more.
And on that, and do people ever really change?
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: hmm. Hmm. Starting with the, do people ever really change? I want to believe that we do, and there's a possibility that we don't, it's a possibility that we come into the world blueprinted and that we just grow into the blueprint, like an Oak tree [00:15:00] is a Oak tree from the sea. To the manifestation of the tree.
And even though it's changed, it's essential oak tree ness never changes. And so there's that way of looking at it. And I don't know in terms of how people are, but the way I experienced myself is that I have changed and, um, evolved in the, every person has and does like, I tell my daughters when they struggle and say they want to, they want to try something new, but they're scared of messing up.
I'll just tell them like, dude, like you don't think like that because listen, when you came into the world, uh, all you could do was eat and poop and sleep. And then you changed like you, you learn to do other things and you can continue to learn, learn to do other things that capacity and ability to do that has never gone away and it never will go away.
As long as you're alive, only your thoughts about it can [00:16:00] become static, but the capacity is always dynamic. And so we can always do that. And, um, and so. You know, I would say, yeah, people can change to me. I'm like, I've changed so many times. Like, uh, I think, you know, that I'm like technically on the, uh, autism spectrum and to myself, I experienced, I can look at my own narrative and there was a time where I, whether I could or couldn't, I don't know, but there was these times in, from a communication standpoint, um, I would not have conversations with people that I thought that what they were saying made no sense.
And so I would just be like, if I started realizing they didn't make sense, I would just stop talking to them and just walk away. And if they asked me, well, why'd you walk away? I didn't have the nuance to say, Oh, you know, I, first of all, back then I would have just said, well, everything you said was ignorant.
[00:17:00] And my brain just doesn't like, Listening to ignorant things. So I
Track 1: so relate, like, you have no idea. I'm just sitting there like, if I could just walk away,
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Yeah. Yeah.
Track 1: have done it several times.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Yeah. And I, and I used to say stuff like that. And when I said it, I didn't know that I was, uh, hurting people's feelings. If, and it wasn't because I was, I was like, I knew. I just knew to tell the truth. So if they told me and I could walk away, like I could say it in her face, but my best, the thing I thought I was being compassionate by just stopping and walking away, cause I could tell I was about to say, I don't want to listen to you anymore.
And I knew that that probably wasn't what I should say. So I would just like walk off cause I didn't know that another option. So I'll just like walk off and, um, And then, and, and when I would say so, like, I'm, I'm just trying to, I'm not trying to be funny, but I used to say, so I just like, I'd be like, I'm done.
And then that person say, Hey, man, how can you talk to me or whatever? And I say, [00:18:00] um, listen, I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, but, uh, everything you're saying is. Completely ridiculous. Um, I don't like having these kinds of conversations and I feel like if I was on my deathbed and I could have five more minutes of life, but it had to end because I had this conversation with you.
I would say, why did I waste 5 minutes talking to this person? So I choose to live 5 extra minutes instead of having this conversation with you. Bye. And then they were like, you a hole. But I, but I thought like, if I tell you clearly, then you'll learn, I'll learn, and we won't have to, we won't have to be like, how's you said, you said,
Track 1: say this. I think autism is actually a superpower.
, honesty to me is a superpower. And if we could all just actually say what it is we meant, I think the world would be a much, much safer place. better place. And a lot of the issues [00:19:00] where you're talking about that sense of belonging and fears and all of those things, I think are because we're wearing these masks and projecting these images and not having the conversations
we need to have.
So, but that's just, , maybe my autistic way of viewing the world,
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: No, I know. I agree with you. And it's like, uh, it's, it's very, it's, it's funny to me. Uh, I just told my daughter a couple of days ago that it was like a superpower. One of my friends, he used to, um, he's a mentor to name Marshall Thurber. He talked about a lot about positive deviance, which is based off of the work of another person whose name I can't remember, but he used to teach, um, his classes on what's, what's Is to be a positive deviant.
So there's people that deviate from societal norms and some people do it negatively. So they're like anarchists or they do something and there's some people who deviate from societal norms in a positive direction. So I choose to look at myself as a positive deviant as opposed to, um, like. [00:20:00] What is called neurodivergent.
It's like, I don't, I look at myself as being a positive deviant and using my powers for good. I mean, I obviously, it took me a while. I had to figure out how to express myself in a way that didn't. And once I realized that I was hurting people's feelings, I stopped doing it. But at first I didn't know. I just thought clarity.
Was the best thing that I could offer to a moment. Um, even when, uh, you know, in the Bible it says, Jesus said, let your yes be yes. And let your no be no. Anything else comes from the evil one. Right? So I literally took it like that. Like, okay, let me just tell this person exactly what I think. They'll know.
I'll know. It'll be good. And like a person could do the same thing to me. Like a person can be like, like I, one time I, I, um, kind of had a crush on a girl when I was in high school. And I just said, Oh, Hey, I would be interested in, uh, getting to know you better. Um, what do you think about that? And like, cause I wasn't scared of girls.
Like a lot of guys were, cause I didn't know to be scared. So I just like, I would be interested in getting to know you better. And she said, [00:21:00] you,
and I was like, Oh, okay. Okay. So that means you don't like me then. Okay. And I didn't feel anything. Like I didn't feel less. I didn't feel more. I was like, I offered her a choice. She was like, my preferences. No. And I was like, okay, fine. And some people, they would be like, Oh, that hurts so bad. And I'd be like, well, how, and I didn't understand why would you be hurt that somebody you like doesn't like you?
They don't have to like you. Like, why do you think that they would like you? And I would just say like, you made up the story of them liking you in your own mind. Now you find out the truth that they don't like you, you should take responsibility for the made up story you made and not hold it against them by being emotionally, holding them emotionally hostage because you want to cry because of a story you made up.
You crying over your own fake story and people like, you don't understand. And I'm like, no, you don't understand. You are fake. Like you made up something. Truth showed up. [00:22:00] And instead of accepting truth, showing up, you decided. I want to continue to believe my fake story and be heard about it. And I don't get that.
I still feel that way, but I wouldn't say that to anybody. Now, I would just be like, okay, then I understand or I accept it. So.
Track 1: So on that, that same kind of note, and then I want to just end with asking a few questions here. I do think that there are stories that aren't told
in that no, or even in that yes.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Mm hmm.
Track 1: think we have to get better as a society, as a people, as a race, as human race,
as telling the story and the why behind it,
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: hmm. Mm hmm.
Track 1: a lot of that creates additional insecurity and there are these layers.
I call it political theater
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Mm hmm.
Track 1: have to navigate through when, if we just simply. [00:23:00] Um, so that's just my little offering to the world is, you know, as you say, I let your yes. B. S. let your no be no. And, uh, I think we'll be in a better place. So, as we close this episode, what I'd like to do is just have you 1st thing that pops to mind, and I'm really excited, especially with you for this, , to see what you say, but I'm going to start a sentence and I just want you to finish the sentence.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: hmm. Hmm. Okay.
Track 1: good? All right. First one, what the world needs now.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Is love sweet love? Cause that song is just a kick into my mind.
Track 1: Okay. How about the best things in life?
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Oh man. I'm going to not go. I'm going to go with the second thing. Cause the second thing is the first thing that goes are free. You know? So the best things in life are mysterious.
Track 1: Oh, mystery is I
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Uh, knowing that you don't know and being excited about it.
Track 1: am.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: I am [00:24:00] I am alive.
Track 1: If only
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: If only I had the time to tell you that there is no time
Track 1: if you had a billboard and you had to put one thing that the whole world would see on it, what would that be?
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: free love and it'd be a double entendre. So it'd be like love is free and liberate love from the confines of our limitations.
Track 1: Okay. Last sentence. Love is,
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Love is would just be the sentence. There would be nothing else after this. Love is
Track 1: well, my friend, I so appreciate you joining the podcast and for sharing your insights and wisdom and [00:25:00] experiences. I think this has been 1 of my, I can't say favorites because all of my episodes are my favorite, but it is certainly high on my list of enjoyment.
I think I can say that safely.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Thanks for your
Track 1: do people get in touch?
Yeah, yeah. How do people get in touch with you, learn more about your projects and connect?
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Um, my email address, which I'm fun to give out is, uh, Pedro, uh, P E D R O at unify Y O U N I F Y. org. So Pedro at unified. org. And then I also have, um, I have a podcast called what's so funny about, which is a comedy podcast. And you can just look up what's so funny about with Pedro Silva on, um, most podcast platforms.
And then Instagram is at the roofless church, T H E R. O O [00:26:00] F L E S S C H U R C H and also have a blog called the ruthless church. com. Um, and one call it's all in me. com I T S A L L I N M E. com. And that's from Whitney Houston song. I'm every woman, even though I'm not a woman, but she said it's all in me.
And I, for some reason, just decided to name my, my, uh, my, uh, blog after that.
Track 1: I love it. So a number of ways to connect. And, , again, just thank you for, for your spirit and for being you.
pedro-silva-ii_2_03-08-2024_110653: Thanks for having me.
Track 1: This has been Compassionate Las Vegas, the podcast. I'm your host, Will Rucker. And as I always remind you, you are not just a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop and what you do matters. So live compassionately. I'll see you next time.​[00:27:00]
